Articles & Writings
Articles. Poetry. Prose. essays.
For many, the restrictions of the pandemic have forced us to examine our lives. Whether we have been shut out of our in-person jobs, shut in with our families underfoot, or have had to disconnect from our normal activities, this time of “isolation” has offered us a thought-provoking mirror. Most notably, the reflection of how we spend our time - which paves our life direction - is staring accusingly at us with, "Well, is this working for you? Is this what you truly want?" Regardless of pandemic restrictions, it is helpful to face these questions with willingness and wonder. Use the opportunity to think of possibilities, have conversations with loved ones, imagine where you'd rather be, what your life would look like in ten years from now. Ask yourself, “What will my life FEEL like if I keep doing exactly what I am doing for the next five years? Am I living in joy? Is my life fulfilling and aligned with my soul?” Provoked by our collective predicament, our souls are longing for us to reconnect with meaning and joy, and take the steps to create the life we really want. Yet we often meet these soul stirrings with hesitation, concern, and a plethora of “good reasons” to keep our status quo, even if we are miserable. The biggest obstacles we face, when contemplating significant life changes are:
Let’s take a look at each one and, in doing so, perhaps do a bit of inner reflection. Practicality Many highly practical people box themselves in to mediocre contentment that feels comfortable to the mind but lacks heart-luster. Oftentimes they build for safety, and eventually hit the wall of boredom or dissatisfaction. Then guilt (and worry) arises when they think of venturing out. Why rock the boat?, they insist, and tighten the anchor. Examine your need to stay within the confines of practicality. Likely you are far safer than you recognize; you’ve got security blankets galore and can probably cut some up to make that quilt you’ve always envisioned. Fear Fear is a biggie and can keep one spinning for decades, finding different concerns and scenarios along the way. There is always something to fear. And, for the most part, our fears are simply fears. We meet life’s challenges and usually survive them. Sometimes we emerge wounded and need healing, but - as they say - stronger than our fear. Whether it’s “False Evidence Appearing Real” inciting you to “Forget Everything And Run” or you believe “For Everything A Reason” and choose to “Face Everything and Rise,” the choices in perspective and action are always yours. How would your life change if you faced your fears instead succumbing to them? Uncertainty The human condition appreciates, even thrives on, certainty. Sleep patterns, the seasons, our daily routines are some areas where predictability and consistency hold us tenderly. Uncertainties feel uncomfortable. We don’t like things being too different from our comfort zone, especially the unexpected. Though we can make conscientious decisions and plan well, there are always uncertainties that hover in the ethers and may even materialize. But even with life’s regularities, there can be sleepless nights, summer storms and startling events. And more often than not, we cope and adjust. We’re resilient that way. Think about your own resilience, especially over this last year’s pandemic. Lack of Confidence Confidence spans a spectrum for many people, depending on the area. One who is confident at work can be insecure in relationships, for example. Confidence corresponds to our experience, practice, success, and our insecurities. Unless we are forced to do something, sometimes our lack of confidence obstructs action, even if that action offers positive results. As toddlers, we learned to walk. We fell, we tried, we got up and continuously practiced until we became confident walkers. Your confidence can grow, but you need to try things (and fail) and practice repeatedly in order to develop. Lack of Support Unfortunately, not everyone has a good support system. Parents, spouses and friends may have good intentions and still not be able to support you appropriately. And, even money challenges can make you feel unsupported by life or our system. Not feeling supported can trigger primal fears, insecurities and feelings of unworthiness. Yet, if we feel the earth under our feet, we know the planet literally supports us. Additionally, we can find ways to gain support from spiritual or community groups, mentors, therapists, and more. Learning to ask for and accept support is also important. You are absolutely worth it! Concern of Hurting Others When we grow and change, we sometimes discover that we fall out of sync with those around us – or worry about it. We believe that changing “too much” will result in loss and hurt, and our fear of abandonment or leaving someone behind can keep us put. A powerful mantra to affirm is, “When I do what is in my highest good, it is ultimately in the highest good of all concerned.” Living this affirmation frees you from holding yourself back in sacrifice of those you love. Belief in Permission Do you recognize the subtle ways in which “lack of permission” may hinder you? People who are rule followers or pride themselves on being “good” often wait for “permission” to take major steps, even if that permission is from “The Universe.” Whether permission is direct (getting a promotion from a boss) or perceived (waiting for a series of life’s green lights to proceed), hesitation and holding oneself back because of an underlying belief in permission can be an unconscious roadblock. Notice if you are waiting for permission. Awareness of our patterns is a huge part of shifting them. You do not need permission to be who you incarnated to be or live the life you envision.
Are you ready to transcend obstacles for the sake of soul purpose and joy?
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There’s perfection, perfectionism and Perfection. Well, there are more words associated with perfection, but let’s start by examining the essence of these three words. According to Oxford Languages’ online dictionary, perfection is defined as “the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects,” while perfectionism is the “refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.” Typically, we infer perfection as a nearly impossible state – especially in the context of the human being – and perfectionism as a neurotic, futile attempt to achieve it. But what about Perfection, with a capital P? No, you won’t find Perfection with a capital P having a specific definition in any dictionary. Unlike God, it is not typically capitalized, or noted to be more perfect than its lowercase version. But, as readers (even non-religious ones), we understand the essential difference between God and god; the former indicating a quality that transcends the ordinariness of lowercase. When God is capitalized, there’s an indication of specificity, a reverence, an unspoken understanding of significance, nobility, grandness, and unequivocal qualities… of Perfection. Whatever your spiritual or religious beliefs, allow yourself to liken the essence of Perfection with God/Goddess (or Source, Creator, or whatever word works for you) as a fundamentally unnamable quality – one that is meant to be experienced by the soul rather than understood by the mind. Using this as our definition, we can follow the path to Perfection. As humans, we may not see ourselves as God, or even god-like with our imperfect behaviors and various shortcomings, but as spiritual beings we also understand that we are aspects of God/Goddess/Source and, therefore, must be created from its Perfection. If the Perfection of God is in all things, so must this Perfection be our humanness – in each one of us – including our multitude of flaws and inadequacies. Buddhism and other eastern traditions teach that life itself is an illusion. That what we experience with our senses – or even think with our minds – is not reality in its entirety. Spiritual awareness enables us to recognize a grander Mystery; one we may never fully comprehend but strive to experience for personal fulfillment, joy and purpose. As we embark on a conscious, spiritual path, we often become seekers of teachers, gurus, and guideposts to be discovered “out there,” only to realize that what we seek is ultimately found within. What if, like our desire to “know God,” we chose to embrace our Perfection? In a culture that is shaped by high expectations of attractiveness, success, material goods, quality workmanship, and keeping up with the (name your family), we have come to realize the harsh consequences that impossible standards can have on the average individual trying to be and/or present perfection and – understandably – failing. Erroneously, we associate this external, polished perfection with our value. Like shifting our attention from an external God that will answer our every prayer (and feeling unworthy when unanswered) to cultivating within a deeper trust in God’s Plan (or Divine Timing or Thy Will), perhaps it’s time to realize that the external perfection that tantalizes us has actually been a call to embrace our essential Perfection. Our spiritual maturation enables us to perceive things from a foundation of Love and Perfection and it’s our human striving that becomes the practice. The path to embracing your Perfection does not need to be dogmatic, nor does it have to be fuel for excuses to do and say and show up as your lowest expression of yourself… but, of course, it can. Instead, like believing in God, perhaps the quest begins as a mere possibility – that it exists and you are interested in discovering more. Like most spiritual practices, embracing your Perfection will take… well, practice. This can start with simple affirmations such as, “I am Perfect and Whole just as I am.” Meditation or visualization can support your process. Listening to and shifting your self-talk away from criticism and towards the remembrance of your Perfection can be affirming. In time, you may come to believe wholeheartedly in your Perfection, in spite of external circumstances indicating you may actually be delusional. Maybe others won’t believe, or trust, or understand, and you will occasionally sink into doubt. This is where cultivated trust acts as reinforcement.
Pressure is often the catalyst for transformation. Wood, fiber, metal, clay and other raw materials become transformed – oftentimes into something useful or beautiful – with conscientious pressure, intention and skill. To say, “2020 has been a year of relentless pressures” would be a gross understatement. And the year is just two-thirds over! We can easily identify several public, mass challenges that have marked our lives this year – at least somewhat directly – but many of us are facing more personal pressures as well. Death, divorce, depression, division, and disaster come to mind… and that’s just a few of the Ds. No matter the personal affects of 2020, one might wonder, “What did I sign up for here?” And that’s a good question, which deserves some openhearted contemplation. With a quiet mind and grounded neutrality, contemplate this unprecedented time as it relates to you. Here are some good starter inquiries:
These contemplations can be held lightly in meditation and allowed to rest, with revelations unfolding over several days. You can also address them more directly, writing each question at the top of a page and allowing the free-form “answers” to flow from your pen, without hesitation or judgment. Another approach is to ask one specific question before bed, trusting that your dreams will offer insights. Recording the dream upon waking sharpens your recollection of it and prompts your inner wisdom for interpretations as details surface. Meeting the pressures of life with inquiry and contemplation empowers us to find the wisdom and opportunities that are buried within. Using what we discover for positive transformation takes intention and willingness. As much as we would love to rest on our laurels with grace and ease, 2020 (and the next few years, according to some astrologers) is demanding more of us – globally and individually. Our collective awakening is gaining momentum now. As infinite beings, we are always a work in progress, ever capable of growth with a plethora of innate gifts to support our evolution. In times of intense pressure, how can we develop our capacities for transformation toward something we actually desire? Not everyone is equally skilled, nor beholds the same vision of usefulness or beauty that transformation can accomplish. To apply a one-size-fits-all suggestion may not resonate. Or work. Yet a simplistic starting point is: know thyself. Currently, many of our shadows and unresolved issues are coming to the forefront. The things we don’t like seeing, feeling, or hoped we’d get to bypass are demanding our attention. Awareness and understanding of ourselves, as well as our so-called issues, make room for acceptance and, if willing, change. Knowing our “personality” is not enough, we must dig deeper – carefully and consciously unearth the rubble and trust we will find some gems. Many of our wounds have devolved into unconscious patterns: feeling bad, closing our hearts, mistreating others or ourselves, acting carelessly, and so on. The more traumatic wounds may appear large and looming, like massive, immoveable stones; whereas smaller discords are more like pebbles that misshape and weigh down our pockets. Unresolved wounds and feelings of unworthiness aren’t “bad,” per se, but are not optimal for joyful authenticity and healthy empowerment. It’s reasonable to deduce that our wounds and beliefs about unworthiness lead to destruction – and we have a chronic condition. The spiritual evolution we are undergoing is not asking for perfection; is it urging us to resolve hindrances to our greatest expression. What we transform within ourselves inextricably affects our world. Fundamentally, we have a natural aptitude for taking care of our needs, albeit sometimes only primordially. As babies we either fulfilled our own needs (sleep, elimination, thumb-sucking) or cried instinctively to get them met (nourishment, comfort, care). Metaphysically, our more subtle faculties also preserve and protect us as we navigate through life. Our inherent remembrance of Oneness enables love, our keen ability to empathize reinforces connectedness, and our capacity to sense emotions and potential volatilities helps us decipher unspoken words or situations. Yet, the wounds and traumas we endure can morph into layers of fear and protectiveness, obscuring our innate gifts, our expression of our authentic selves, and our joy. By recognizing and cultivating our inherent gifts we begin to dissolve the blocks that limit us and clear the pathways that lead us back to our essence – the origin of our power and joy. Whether working with a skilled practitioner, participating in a conscientious group, or choosing to work alone, understanding the core of our obstacles can help us access self-compassion and illuminate our capabilities. With conscious assessment, we can discover the relation between obstacle and gift. For example, if hurt-feelings, rejection and abandonment are wounds that became blocks, we can “turn the coin over” to recognize caring, love and connection as foundational gifts. Try this simple exercise using list-making to discover your hidden gems:
With your list of gems, decide which ones you wish to polish first and brainstorm ways in which to do so. Do you want to take a class? Read books? Moreover, take note of what you are already doing to preserve your gifts. If you are naturally sensitive, fortify healthy ways to preserve your sensitivity. You may decide to learn the art of clairvoyance, clairaudience or mediumship. If your big heart loves deeply but you’ve guarded it from intimacy, maybe you learn relationship-building skills in a safe and compassionate environment. If underneath your criticism and judgment you discover your affinity for peace and justice, perhaps art will be a joyful way to express and create the harmony you envision.
by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. Recovering addicts who attend Twelve-Step meetings frequently dramatically change their lives. What makes “The Program” so effective? A group of people all facing the same challenges, who meet and share their experiences without judgment or comment is an extraordinarily safe space that encourages reflection and self-examination, and provides a supportive environment for experiments with change. There are many reasons for the success of 12-Step programs. One critical element is the many tools shared among addicts. Some of the tools we explore are: Meetings
Sharing Stories
Slogans
Sponsors
There are many tools available at a Twelve-Step program, and every member has their own favorites. This is a short overview of some of the tools addicts use to change their lives. There are 12-Step meetings for nearly any addiction, and they are all free, confidential, and powerful! If one deals with your struggle - welcome! by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. In 1972, the film “Man of La Mancha” was released, telling the story of the very nearsighted Don Quixote (played by Peter O’Toole), who mistakes windmills for attacking giants and renames a local tavern prostitute, Aldonza, (played by the gorgeous Sophia Loren) his “Lady Dulcinea.” Don Quixote’s theme song is “The Impossible Dream” and he sees the world through his own rose-colored (and slightly blind) glasses. At first Aldonza goes along with his madness, but following her abduction and rape by a band of muleteers, she doesn’t want to play anymore. In the song “Aldonza” she screams her frustration at not being seen for who she is. It is easy to empathize with her rage. Every woman has felt the insult of being perceived just as some man wants her to be, rather than who she really is. Our sense of identity is strongly tied to outside validation – we need others to confirm our self-image. Aldonza fought hard all her life to find the power to claim herself, to make her way in a world that uses and abuses her. She built up an impregnable wall of attitude. And it worked! Aldonza is self-sufficient, she chooses by whom and how she is used. She has earned her independence. Aldonza learned to survive in a hostile world. She cannot be hurt, because she doesn’t care what anyone else thinks. Like many survivors, her anger is her armor. Aldonza has a clear, unsentimental view of who and what she is. She has no illusions, and few (or no) dreams. When Quixote first appeared, he made her see a different possible life, and she was temporarily drawn in to thinking she could fit in his dream world. She momentarily tasted idealism. Finally, though, Quixote’s “gentle insanity” offers only despair, and leaves her defenseless. Those of us who are also survivors know just how deadly that is! Therefore, we sat and nodded at her song, and wondered what is wrong with this old man who refuses to grant her the respect she deserves for her unlikely survival. We joined in her fury and outrage, and remembered all the times our own reality has been denied, how often we were misjudged and overlooked. And we sobbed with her. Don Quixote: My lady... Aldonza: I am not your lady!... However, there is more to this projection than a man who decides who a woman “really” is. Quixote is an archetype, as is Aldonza. Aldonza is every human, the soul walking the earth learning to survive by any means possible. She is the unquenchable fire of life, the will to survive, the essence of the survivor. Quixote is Idealism personified. He sees life as it should be, and chooses to live in his dreams of glory, of honor, of the Impossible Dream. His reason for being is not merely survival, but ”to be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause.” Don Quixote: And still thou art my lady. Aldonza: And still he torments me! Quixote is the manifestation of Spirit, the Goddess, the Creator; and He sees Aldonza’s True Self – the Child created and loved by the Divine, to whom no amount of earthly refuse can ever soil! Aldonza wastes her time proclaiming she is “the most casual bride of the murdering scum of the earth” – because Spirit knows she is really “My Lady” – and He refuses to accept her self-loathing as valid. He insists on seeing the innocent, beautiful, pure child who dwells in each of us. Aldonza: Take the clouds from your eyes Don Quixote: Now and forever thou art my lady Dulcinea! Spirit ignores “the kitchen slut reeking of sweat” and sees only and always Dulcinea – the noble lady who bears his standard, who doesn’t need to do anything to earn his undying devotion. For each of us is Dulcinea, and Spirit will not be evaded – Spirit sets His Hound of Heaven on us, and will not stop until we surrender to His love. In God’s eye, each of us is the epitome of beauty, of grace, of noble bearing and the essence of chivalry. Our soul is the prize that God demands, and pursues with irresistible tenacity. There is nothing we can do to change His view of us, we will never convince Him that we are ”no one, I’m nothing, I’m only Aldonza, the whore.” That sense of being watched, that hot breath on our neck? That is the Eye of God, always watching us; that is the breath of the Hound of Heaven, hot on our trail, determined to capture us and return us to the loving arms of God. And with Aldonza, our habitual recourse is to scream in frustration. But we might just as well give up – be still - and let Spirit love us! This is my quest
To follow that star Ooh, no matter how hopeless No matter how far To fight for the right Without question or pause To be willing to march, march into hell For that heavenly cause ~The Impossible Dream by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. Recently the Catholic Church named Mother Teresa a saint. She met all the Church’s criteria for sainthood, including having performed several miracles. How could anyone find that appalling? Aside from whether she was a good person (there are strong arguments that she was not, but instead denied pain killers to people because she thought “suffering was Christ-like”!), there is an argument that any miracle proves that God is not good! He was a “born-again Christian” happily driving along the freeway on a hot day, when his car suddenly stopped. As a man of faith, he pulled to the side of the road, jumped out of the car, knelt in the dirt on the shoulder, and prayed. Ten minutes later he got back in his car – and it started right up! “A miracle!,” he proclaimed to his atheist sister, “This is proof that God exists and answers prayers!” His sister asked, “How many children died during that ten minutes? How many women were raped? How many people got terminal diagnoses? What was wrong with their prayers, that it was better for God to play auto-mechanic for you than to save them?” The attributes of God that form the basis of a philosophy of religion paradox are:
If God hates the evil but cannot stop it, He is not all powerful. If God is all powerful but doesn’t interfere, then God is not all good. One attempt to answer this paradox relies on the argument that we mere mortals cannot understand the Mind of God – that what we see as evil is not really evil. So after we open all the jails (where evil people are punished) we can eliminate all laws, and trust that God will not allow evil! If we object to eliminating laws and letting criminals run free, then we really don’t believe that God, in His Omniscience, sees evil more clearly as some ultimate good. This paradox led many idealists to Eastern religions, where the concept of Karma seemed to restore virtue – people suffer evil because of past-life decisions and actions! Of course, the concept of punishing and tormenting an infant because of something they must have done in another body, in another time and place, that they cannot remember, also appears to be evil! What is a miracle? According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a miracle is “an extraordinary and welcome event that is not explicable by natural or scientific laws and is therefore attributed to a divine agency.” So this says a miracle is always good and that it breaks natural and scientific laws. Miracles certainly demonstrate that God is all powerful – He can suspend the laws of nature and science in order to make someone happy! But what does a miracle say about God’s goodness? Here, we enter the rabbit’s hole of circular definitions! The Oxford dictionary defines goodness as “the quality of being morally good or virtuous.” And virtuous is “conforming to moral and ethical principles; morally excellent; upright.” Ethical means “pertaining to or dealing with morals or the principles of morality; pertaining to right and wrong in conduct, or 2) being in accordance with the rules or standards for right conduct or practice.” How can a good God choose who deserves to have the laws of Nature broken? Does that mean that everyone else praying for a miracle is unworthy? Or is God choosing at random, ignoring the value of the person praying? Does such a random choice “conform to rules of right conduct?" Every time God breaks the rules to save one person, He is ignoring millions of innocents who are diligently praying for relief. Saying God performs (or allows) miracles is a claim that God is not good, but instead uses no criteria in selecting who gets the benefits of miracles, that miracles are simply gratuitous and certainly unwarranted. And again, such a random God is no longer all good. If God is all good, there can be no miracles. (Still no explanation for why evil exists, unfortunately!) by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. Ministers in New Age Spiritual Centers are familiar with the visits of “seekers” – people who spend their weekends visiting churches and centers, looking for the perfect teacher, the right teaching, the best spiritual practice. They won’t “settle” for just any place, but relentlessly travel and do comparison shopping among all the spiritual goods on display. Jack Kornfield, a Buddhist teacher, wrote: "Spiritual transformation is a profound process that doesn’t happen by accident. We need a repeated discipline, a genuine training, in order to let go of our old habits of mind and to find and sustain a new way of seeing. To mature on the spiritual path, we need to commit ourselves in a systematic way. My teacher Achaan Chah described this commitment as “taking the one seat." He goes on: “Achaan Chah’s description is both literal and metaphorical, and his image of taking the one seat describes two related aspects of spiritual work. Outwardly, it means selecting one practice and teacher among all of the possibilities, and inwardly, it means having the determination to stick with that practice through whatever difficulties and doubts arise until you have come to true clarity and understanding.” (“Take the One Seat” - Jack Kornfield, Tricycle, Summer 1993) Advancement on a spiritual path requires that you let go of the role of “seeker” and embrace being a disciple. Instead of searching for a perfect teacher, the work begins when one sits down and says, with the old Civil Rights anthem, “I will not be moved." There are teachers everywhere, and prospective students can spend a lifetime looking – or can sit down and choose to actually begin a practice that will lead to connection with the Divine. Finding the right place and teacher are important, but never more important than beginning to practice.
Find a space and teacher that:
Of course, there are cults and those who would abuse your trust. Run away from a place or teacher that:
In Buddhism these principles are stated as the three refuges: “I take refuge in the Buddha (the teacher) the Dharma (the teachings), and the Sangha (the community).” When all three are in place, spiritual practice and growth are supported and become possible. The Teacher (Buddha) is ideally someone who lives the teachings in daily life. Avoid the trap of searching for the Buddha himself – remember the Buddhist adage, “if you meet the Buddha on the road, KILL HIM!” The Buddha is long gone, and anyone claiming to be him is an imposter, trying to take advantage of your spiritual longings. Commit to a teacher with integrity, experience, and love of spiritual practice. If the Teachings (Dharma) are some you are familiar with already, fine. If you must learn a new structure, names, titles, name for the Divine – that can be fun, and offer a whole different experience of spiritual work! There may be a sense of “coming home” when the message resonates at a deep level. There is no one “right” path for everyone – explore enough to find the one that feeds your soul, make a commitment, and SHOW UP! The Community (Sangha) is where discipleship grows. In the community, there are many teachers, examples of life lived well, and people to offer support and guidance through the weeds. The community provides new friendships, partners, role models and help. Most of all, the community is a refuge, a place to find comfort when life brings pain and despair. Becoming a disciple is more emotion than logic! The soul recognizes its home, and breathes a sigh of relief when the resting place appears. The guidelines for making a selection are simple and easily met, and to begin does NOT require a long study – though proficiency certainly will require mental effort and courage. Expect to encounter doubt, confusion, and disappointment. The journey is long and never easy, though it is joyful and satisfying – and in the end, the entire reason for this visit to Earth! by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. Our calendar of holidays is derived from a long history of Pagan Holy Days, celebrating the movement of the earth around the sun every year. In the USA, many holidays were given a thin veneer of Christian folklore to cover and hide the original, earth-centered celebrations. We begin with the Pagan New Year, Samhain (pronounced sow-win), the time when the veils between the worlds were thinnest, and loved ones who had crossed over could visit this plane. Thus, the tradition of giving treats to people disguised as visitors from the other side when they come around to “trick-or-treat.” Now the Goddess ages into the Crone – hence the popularity of the “witch” disguise! This holiday is still celebrated on October 31; the Christian story is that the celebration was leading up to All Saints Day, so it was re-named All Hallows Eve – Halloween.
Soon comes the Winter Solstice, celebrated as Yule by our Celtic ancestors (and under many other names around the world). Because this was such a well-loved holy day, the Christians moved their celebration of Jesus’ birth to coincide with the well-established revelry (ignoring the notion that Jesus was most likely born in October). This is also the rebirth of the Goddess, as the earth enters slumber. Next is Imbolc, the holiday of re-dedication. In many modern Wicca circles, we welcome and initiate new members. Naturally, Christians also adopted Brigid’s celebration and gave it to the only “goddess” they recognize. Candlemas is a Christian holiday celebrated annually on February 2. It celebrates three occasions according to Christian belief: the presentation of the child Jesus; Jesus' first entry into the temple; and it celebrates the Virgin Mary's purification (mainly in Catholic churches). As the year progresses, and the Goddess born at Yule ages to become the Maiden, we come to the Spring Equinox, or the first day of spring. The holy day Ostara is renamed Easter, and celebrates the death and revival of the God – also seen as the return of Kore, the maiden who would be revered as Persephone, queen of Hades. All the traditional icons of spring’s fecundity are somehow added to the Christian celebration of death and resurrection, so lambs, eggs, and bunnies are everywhere! Next is Beltane, which our modern world calls May Day. Beltane is the ceremony of joining – a time to “leap the fire” and run off to the woods with the beloved. Beltane babies are a gift of the Goddess, and no father need be named. There does not seem to be much current Christian celebration, though Waldorf schools retain the European May Pole dance in celebration of spring. At Summer Solstice, Litha, the Goddess is now the Mother – it is the time for nurturing and fertilizing all the dreams of spring. This is the time to buckle down and work to grow the crops planted. Traditionally there was a midsummer’s celebration, but it seems to have gotten misplaced! Perhaps Father’s Day is the new midsummer? Next is Lammas (or Lughnasada, games of Lugh in the Celtic calendar), the first of the three harvest festivals. It is perhaps honored in the west as Labor Day, but there are few traditions other than picnics to mark the end of vacation. Wiccans mark the holiday by baking a figure of the god in bread and eating it, to symbolize the sanctity and importance of the harvest. The name Lammas (contraction of loaf mass) implies it is an agrarian-based festival and feast of thanksgiving for grain and bread, which symbolizes the first fruits of the harvest. Mabon is celebrated at the Autumn Equinox, the second of the harvest festivals. Wikipedia says that the name Mabon was coined by Aidan Kelly around 1970 as a reference to Mabon ap Modron, a character from Welsh mythology. But this is a much older holy day! There is little in the modern calendar, though children at Waldorf schools celebrate Michaelmas, the Catholic feast of the Archangel Michael, with an exciting play where Archangel Michael (mick – ay – ell) defeats the dragon and saves the countryside. Perhaps this also came to us as Thanksgiving, a festival of thankfulness for the gifts of the harvest. And so we return to Samhain – the end and the beginning. Without our pagan roots, we would have a far less interesting year – and fewer long weekends! The dictionary explains the word Pagan as: late Middle English: from Latin paganus ‘villager, rustic,’ from pagus ‘country district.’ Latin paganus also meant ‘civilian,’ becoming, in Christian Latin, ‘heathen’ (i.e., one not enrolled in the army of Christ). All of us rustic Villagers who refuse to join the army spend our time celebrating the cycle of the year!
by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div.
There is a single word we can – and often do – use to make ourselves miserable. This word makes one unhappy with a life, a spouse, a job, a daily routine – in fact, with everything it touches. If we are determined to be miserable all the days of our lives, we can sprinkle this word liberally in all our thoughts, plans, and reactions! The powerful word to destroy our happiness? SHOULD. In 12-step programs, this is called “should-y thinking.” SHOULD acts as instant short hand to reject everything in life, to judge life as lacking and insufficient. The following chart gives some examples of how it does its magic:
SHOULD works to instantly rob every victory of sweetness, to sour every moment. Entire books have been written on the power of gratitude, but they could all be summed up as “Stop SHOULDING on yourself!”
One woman was determined to change her spoken words to support a joy-filled life. She adopted “Cancel” as the cue that should-y thinking was present. If an inadvertent SHOULD slithered into her speech, she would instantly exclaim “Cancel! Cancel!” And express her gratitude for some aspect of the situation. See how this approach can change a day, an experience, a life:
Should-y thinking has great power to destroy. Look back on every moment of disappointment, despair, pain and anger – and find the “should-y” thinking at the root. Pollyanna had a point – her elimination of “should” made a life of joy and grace possible.
Current research on chronic pain shows that pain originates in the brain, and must be controlled from there if there is to be relief. Therefore, the current treatment is to teach that “what you resist persists” and that pain can be reduced and borne only by rejecting should-y thinking, and learning to work with the pain, rather than engaging in a constant war with the body and brain! All those old sayings in 12-step programs are now being proved by scientific brain scans and experimentation! Science now says you can put the opioids down and go back to the mindfulness meditation classes -- and be happy! Source material:
by Rev. Tess Pender, M. Div. In the Wicca (or Pagan) calendar, the year is divided by eight Sabbats, or holidays (Holy Days) marked by the earth’s journey around the sun. Summer solstice 2017 in the northern hemisphere will be at 9:24 PM on Tuesday, June 20 and marks the first day of summer. The days have been growing longer (more daylight) ever since the winter solstice on December 21. On the solstice the time of light and dark are equal (at the equator) and now we begin the journey into darkness, with each day having less daylight. This is the beginning of the time of growing, which will lead to the harvests to be celebrated in August, September, and October. At the spring equinox we were invited to make resolutions, to decide what dreams to pursue in the coming year. Now is the time to do the work of nurturing and feeding those dreams. Summer is the time to attend classes, learn a new skill, do the tiring work necessary to pursue dreams. If your goal in spring was to change careers, now is the time to acquire the skills and training needed, to apply for jobs, to take the risk of ending an unsuitable job or unfulfilling work. If the goal was to form a new love relationship, now is the time to sign up on dating sites, visit places to meet a new interest, and clear out all the old aces-in-the-hole that stand in the way of your availability. This is the time to develop patience. Just as the gardener doesn’t pull up new plants to check on their growth, we must simply do the work, and stop the constant measuring and evaluating that are so much a part of our training. Summer’s work is difficult, frightening, and tests your resolve. It is the time for the leap of faith, of taking chances and living your dreams. It is time for the work of planting and fertilizing, of watering and waiting. It is the very epitome of faith and hope; acting without knowing, and acting as if all your dreams are promised. There are no promises. All the work you have done to date – researching possible choices, learning more about yourself, then deciding on a path – may lead to a dead end of despair. When the harvest festivals of autumn arrive, you will take stock, and discover then whether your work has borne fruit. Sometimes, no crop comes in. It is hard to let that be okay! The challenge is not really to set a goal and accomplish it, but to understand when a goal is not really for you, to recognize a wrong path, to do the work and then to let go of the old goal. Standing in a field, with sweat rolling off you in rivers, only you can decide if you have chosen a false path, and only you can dig for the courage to start walking a new path. We are never alone at this crucial decision point. The Goddess is with us, holding us as we wrestle with the desire to continue on the wrong path, to avoid wasting the years of preparation. The Goddess - and our highest selves - stand just around the bend, beckoning us to attempt one more journey. The angels cheer when we admit defeat and, as the song says, “pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again.” All the experiences of “failure” will provide wonderful stories, better judgement, experience and wisdom. Rita Mae Brown said, “Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment." Summer is the time to focus on building good judgment! Part of our spiritual evolution is releasing old patterns, which can include our sense of identity. Sometimes this is done with very conscious work, other times - like losing a loved one - it can happen unexpectedly. Unlike losing a loved one, we may not actually be able to pinpoint why we feel as if we've lost something or someone. Whether we do our ego-dissolving work with consciousness, or things simply shift on their own, we may encounter strange sensations that could be easily described as grief. But then we might feel bad about those feelings - or ourselves. One of the most insidious teachings in the New Thought movement is the "be positive" mantra. Our emotions are indicators, not to be ignored or suppressed. Nor are they to be controlling every aspect of our lives. Grieving is a normal process when something we love or hold close to us is lost. Even when we buy a new home, we may grieve for the home we are leaving. If grief is arising for you here are some ways to be with it:
It is quite intense out there! We are so raw, so naked, and so ready to experience ourselves in our exquisite heart-centered tenderness and this is merely part of the unveiling. Ah... the complexity of being utterly human with enough consciousness to know just how flawed we ALL are. The "greater" the consciousness (awareness) the greater the capacity to see all the nuances that make up the human being. And, as those who are traveling a path toward understanding and loving self and others, we STUMBLE. Often. And it usually hurts. Part of this "pain" is KNOWING that we are paradoxically PERFECT and IMPERFECT and that we - as humans - tend to screw up and then judge (whether judging another's screw up or our own). And something about this just doesn’t sit well with a conscious mind. Because what - after all - does it mean to screw up in the first place? Mistakes indicate a "right" and a "wrong." And again there lies a paradox since the "spiritual truth" is there is no duality (and likely no absolute "truth"). Most spiritual seekers understand we are one collective body and there is a longing to be in harmony with the whole. But sometimes - just like our physical bodies - the mouth wants something that ISN'T good for the digestive system. Often there are "conflicts" within the organism that should support the one. Doesn't this seem counter to a Universal wisdom? Our bodies "fail" us with dis-ease. Our minds have conflicting thoughts... dark ones, altruistic ones. Our ego is both helpful (preserving the system as a whole) and easily crosses the line to selfishness. But WHERE is that line? Who is the judge of the line? So we shrink back in shame and sometimes despair, not just in fear of making mistakes, but because we inherently LOVE the whole. And often the individuals that make up the whole (or at least we want to) and we simply, sincerely don't want to cause harm. Our souls are inherently perfect and loving. And through spiritual unfoldment (a natural process) we want that harmony within and around us in this third-dimensional experience. So we strive, we test the waters, we experiment with leaning into our part in the process and we "fail" at something along the way. Oh, but then we remember that it is all an illusion and go lick our wounds, and perhaps the wounds of others. Or maybe we’ve dedicated years to healing the sick and wounded and we wonder and cry for the depths of the human wounds. For those who are ultra-sensitive, we deeply feel all of it and this can be overwhelming. Again, the intention was never to add harm. Like a child in a play yard, we simply wanted to engage in this Earthly experience. Intention or not, accidents and harm happen. And this is what we must face: the inevitable "ugliness" of life. Flowers die, fruits whither, branches fall and injure people, words intended to help cut like knives. Do we retreat in mediation to "fix" ourselves? Do we take another course in x, y or z? Do we stop helping those who trust and admire our ability to meet them – human to human – because we are imperfect and have the capacity to harm? We could. It certainly feels safer. It’s the thought that counts, right? So the question becomes, "How perfect or spiritually aligned must I be in order to share my gifts with others?" Unlike romantic relationships, the stakes seem to be higher in this arena. Expectations for being perfect beings go through the spiritual roof! How can we ever live up to this tall order even if we did make a soul agreement to help humanity before we incarnated? “Great or small,” each of us is playing a role in this big cosmic game of life. We can take it "serious" and really strive to be "better" than we were yesterday… oh, but better indicates some kind of evaluation. Who is the evaluator again? God? Source? The All That I AM? So does that mean me? And what was the point of this game? Do we take it all in casually and play merely for the sake of our own enjoyment? Do we compete? Cooperate? Create? Co-create? Win? Lose? Is game just a metaphor? Isn’t this an illusion? A matrix? A cosmic reality show? And who is directing all this?
Many believe that developing one’s intuition – or getting information from a professional psychic – will ensure that they will “know” whatever they need to know, when they need to know it. There is a false sense of “all will be well once I know the answer” kind of security. This is not only unrealistic; it is a set up for disappointment and can distract you from the deeper gifts available from intuitive insights. Our intuitive senses are… well, senses. And, given that they are metaphysical (denoting “beyond” or “behind”), they are a bit less tangible than our physical senses – though one may experience physical sensations through psychic awareness. Although it may be mind-bogglingly awesome to have some “spot on” intuitive insights, it’s important to understand that intuitive senses are prone to the same misperceptions as our other senses. When undeveloped, intuitive discernment is tricky to say the least. Yet even as the professional hones in on mastered psychic skills, the information offered may not be accurate all of the time. Why is that? First, notice how often your own senses mislead you…. I swear I heard someone knocking!... I’m sure I saw the light was green!... It didn’t taste spoiled when I ate it! When filtering extra-sensory perceptive information many things may be happening at once; sounds, words, feelings, body sensations, images, colors, and complete “knowings” can bombard the intuitive, whether novice or professional. Receiving and delivering intuitive information is a multi-dimensional form of communication. It takes practice detecting, interpreting and finally translating such ethereal perceptions. Even the best communicator can sometimes misunderstand what’s being conveyed and respond inadequately. Another reason intuitive insights can be “inaccurate” is that we are complex human beings with an array of beliefs, feelings, fears, and tendencies. Let’s say you are trying to psychically “peg” another person so you can “know” his or her romantic intentions toward you. A psychic read can tap into another person’s deep-seated fear such as “I don’t trust anyone because I was abandoned” and detect a closed heart. It can pick up on the person’s behavioral tendency; “I love the sexual charge of new attractions.” And, of course, it can read the person from a higher soul level; “I wish to transcend my relationship issues and open to real love.” All of these perceptions may be concurrently true, yet from which aspect the person chooses to act will impact the outcome. When it comes to psychic predictions and insights, here is a good analogy: If you are driving up a U.S. highway heading toward Canada, you could stop at a gas station and ask, “Am I going to get to Canada?” The local, who might know the route like the back of his hand, could reply, “Absolutely.” Essentially, the local is basing his answer on your intention to get to Canada as well as the highway and direction you are travelling. Noticing that you are travelling by car, not bike, he may also be able to predict how long it will take you to get there. The response is only as good as the considerations at that instance. The local has no control as to whether you decide to turn around and go to Mexico, or if you change course or vehicle and take the long, scenic route to Canada. Whether they are your own intuitive insights, or those offered by a professional psychic, it is absolutely possible to make fascinating and accurate predictions! Although this can be extremely exciting, and even feel promising, psychic “knowings” don’t mean you will be forever joyful. True joy is not based on having certainties in life. Sometimes the initial attraction to obtaining psychic information is the sense of security that it might offer, and many of us equate security with happiness. Yet security is an illusion. Sure, we all long for “enough” money, a forever love relationship, a solid roof over our head, and optimal health. As much as these things can make us feel good, they don’t guarantee authentic joy nor are they promised to us indefinitely. Life happens. People get sick, jobs change, lovers leave, roofs leak. Since change is the only constant, we must find ways to unlock joy within us, amidst perpetual change.
As part of our spiritual evolution our metaphysical senses will continue to sharpen and become just as active and efficient as our physical senses. Our third eye will see more clearly, our gut feelings will be easily identifiable, our higher knowing will integrate with our thoughts, and our ability to hear and communicate with other realms will increase exponentially. Channeling messages from non-earthly beings – from angels to galactic travelers – will be as easy as tuning in to our favorite radio stations and singing along with the latest hits. For many skilled intuitives, this is already the case. Across the world wide web you’ll find a plethora of offerings from light beings, star systems, parallel universes, and even the future. At this time of expanding consciousness, many people are directly experiencing the art and gifts of channeling. Although it is an indication of heightened awareness, it is important to evaluate and assimilate that which is truly valuable. Everyone is a Channel Whether or not we have developed our intuitive senses, each of us has them. As with any skill – including walking or riding a bike – it merely takes practice to become proficient. Imagine if we lived in a culture in which using our metaphysical senses was expected and honored? “What’s your gut telling you,” mom would ask, and then she would validate your response. As spiritual-human beings, each of us is an extension of God Consciousness. Therefore, whatever we say or do is also from the same consciousness! This does not condone behaviors that are misaligned or void of love, but rather reminds us of our inherent divinity. If we understand that the core of who we are cannot be separated from that Divine impulse we begin to realize that every action, thought or word is an extension of Source, in spite of our humanness. As every expression of God is fully empowered to believe, act and say whatever desired because of free will, the challenge thus lies in aligning with Love. Evaluate the Messages for Love Connecting with realms that are less familiar to us can be uncomfortable or even frightening at first, and it is always important to evaluate the love that is present. Channeled messages from deceased loved ones can be based in fear, hate and anger just as easily as they can be brought forth to offer support, love and new perspectives. To be clear, transitioning to the “other side” does not mean a spirit has evolved or let go of its resentments. If grandma’s channel says she loved you better than your father and goes on to share her woes about unresolved issues, this message is not only of a lower frequency, it can dampen your own energy field if you give it unnecessary value. Empower yourself to evaluate the information received and if it is not from Love, feel free to delete that channel! Spirit guides are just as diverse as the universe itself, ranging from the animal kingdom to star beings and beyond. It is critical to use discernment with these aspects and understand that – like passed loved ones – they may not be as evolved as you expect. The key, again, is to limit your interactions to those that align with Love. Whether you consider yourself a channel or simply feel connected to a particular spirit guide, it is important to note that it is not appropriate for spirit guides to urge sexual encounters, nor should they present themselves as being more “powerful” than you. As with people, do not give any spirit guide your power or authority. Messages from the Pleiades, Archangel Michael, High Councils or other ascended realms are authentic when they are infused with Love Consciousness. Because these aspects are highly evolved they will not encourage separation consciousness or indicate a hierarchy based on “better than.” When connecting with refined states of consciousness, the energy feels unconditionally loving or, because we are emotional beings, can sometimes feel strangely neutral. The information presented helps us see our choices, experience the love that we are, and remember unity. More often than not, these messages are for your own personal growth and do not necessarily mean you need to share them with the world. This is for you to decide. Advice or predictions channeled from Love Consciousness are offered simply to help us see and understand the larger picture in relation to our power and potential, often urging us to take an active part in our own evolution. Pay Attention to Your Feelings As a channel, we can receive information in many forms including physical sensations, visions, sounds, direct messages, and spontaneous knowing. As a human, our body, mind and emotions are valid components to help us discern what feels appropriate and what does not. Although fear can be an annoying alarm triggered by almost anything, it can also be a valuable tool. As we become more conscious, we can learn to differentiate “good fear” from “bad fear.” Thankfully, fears that are warranted can help us navigate away from people, situations and energies that are not in our best interest. Unreasonable fears, however, will make us feel paralyzed and uncertain about everything. Either way, it is extremely important to refrain from channeling if you are in a fearful state. The whole point of channeling is to bring information that serves. When we ignore our own needs – whether we discount what we feel or give our power away to another form of “wisdom” – we are not acting in aligned service. The martyr archetype is not necessary, or even helpful, in our collective ascension. Always notice and validate your human needs when channeling. Being anchored in neutrality allows us to clearly monitor our own experiences as well as evaluate the energy and information that is coming through when we channel. From this state, we remain in our power. Assimilate Your Channel We have reached a level of collective consciousness that enables us to integrate the highly evolved aspects of ourselves, including our beloved channels. Admittedly, we probably shouldn’t absorb grandma and all her issues, or may not want to assimilate an animal totem. However, there’s no reason why we can’t merge our heart and wisdom with the Love Consciousness that is palpable within the ascended masters’ and angelic realms. By no means is this to imply that you should claim to be Mother Mary or the next savior! Not only are these inaccurate proclamations, they sprout from an egoic need to feel validated. Ascended Love does not need validation; it merely offers us continuous opportunities to merge with it. Once you recognize the ease and unity you experience as a channel, it may be time to evaluate the reasons you continue to separate your human self from that which you channel. Remember, all separation comes from the ego, whether to feel valid or better than, or because of a belief in unworthiness. Yet, the main gift brought through high caliber channeling is the remembrance of Love and Unity! When you integrate your highly evolved state – often referred to as something you channel – incorporating soul wisdom becomes second nature and is extremely powerful as it anchors on the planet as you. In a culture of deeds and doers, it seems a bit – or even extremely – passive to simply allow. Allow what? Allow the hungry to starve? Allow an abusive relationship to continue? Allow my house to get messy and taxes to go unfiled? Our fear-based egos start to drum up all kinds of scenarios to demonstrate the harm in allowing. So let’s go there…. Let’s sit with this fear of allowing before we proceed. Our first instinct is to equate allowing with not doing, right? And “not doing” is not a fruitful option in many areas of our lives; we get bad grades when we don’t do our homework, get fired when we don’t do our jobs, or lose relationships when we don’t engage in them. Yet, deeper than our discomfort with living in an embarrassingly messy home, or our fear of having the IRS levy our bank accounts, there is a core fear in allowing. Sadly, many of us have experienced the pain and helplessness of being a victim. As children, we were powerless over the situations and adults in our lives, and most of us had crucial experiences that hurt us in some way. In order to protect ourselves and assert our power we learned to do – and sometimes overdo – in order to navigate our way from victimhood to feeling more in control. It is clear that many of our personal actions have led us to where we are now. We see the correlation between action and consequence. Yet, a common pattern that develops as we grow spiritually is many of our willful efforts and attempts to maintain control become increasingly less effective. It is in this way our higher soul is inviting us to allow. For many, being the “good girl” or doing the “right thing” leads to a life of monotony, limitation and unfulfilled potential. Again, the dualistic mind assumes the implication here is to be “bad” or do the “wrong thing,” but this is a matter of perspective. We have let society, our parents, and others we hold as authority figures define the boundaries of what we should be doing with our lives, and how to do them. So, now let’s practice a bit of conscious allowing. Take a moment to relax, breathe deeply, focus on your heart, and feel into the statement: I have let society, my parents, and others define what I should be doing with my life, and how to do them. What comes up for you? If inspired, write down your response. Or simply allow this experience to unfold a little longer before moving on. You may notice: Conscious allowing is as simple as creating the space in the present moment to experience what is. Even though our thoughts may go wild, confusion or feelings begin to arise, or that “I must try harder” impulse stirs up some anxiety, if we stay present, using the support of our breath and the openness of our heart, we can allow all of it… thoughts, feelings, confusion, agitation, surrender. Whatever is. Allowing offers an alignment with our essence, an expansion of trust, and carries a sublime awareness of Universal Perfection. In life and along our spiritual path, we encounter things that are unfamiliar and uncomfortable, and allowing can be one such thing. And though we may intellectually comprehend the notion of allowing, our souls will prompt us to experience it in deeper ways. Oftentimes, this comes in the form of crisis. Our normal reaction to crisis is, “What can I do?” With clear reasoning and responsible actions, we can positively impact the situation, even if we can’t completely resolve it. Clearly, doing can be extremely beneficial, but when we believe we will gain 100% control over an issue (and the people involved) with action alone we have fallen into a trap of the ego. In addition to our reliance on doing, those of us who have spiritually embraced the “Law of Attraction” often find ourselves conflicted when life doesn’t go our way. Rather than recognizing this as a chance to allow, we resort to self-blame. I must not have visualized clearly. My negative thoughts are blocking me. I’m not enlightened enough. As these beliefs imply that even more action is required of us, our angst intensifies! Part of releasing our ego-driven practices is shifting the ego’s understanding of the Law of Attraction. In reality, attraction entails allowing. Admittedly, the Law of Attraction is a fun and enticing tool to help us understand our true power. Novice spiritual seekers are like children in a candy shop who have yet to understand that just because one can “create reality” doesn’t mean one’s goal is in alignment with the Higher Self. In fact, satisfying the ego’s desires is rarely the path chosen by advanced souls. Generally speaking, our ability to manifest will work for a while, encouraging us to trust our inherent gifts and dig deeper into our soul. Yet, as we evolve, merging with our collective ascension, creating from the ego becomes ineffectual. Thus, when our manifesting skills diminish, we are ready to master allowing. Although we can choose to learn the art of allowing any time, life challenges offer down-to-earth opportunities to practice it. With our fixation on actions and control, plus our right versus wrong primal thinking, allowing can feel counter-everything that’s been tried and true. Yet, by taking baby steps to practice this cathartic skill we open ourselves to the freedom and joy our souls envision. Allowing may not be easy, but it is always accessible and begins with choice. If you are ready to experiment, or your soul is coercing you with interesting circumstances, or if you tend to over-give, here are some ways you can open to conscious allowing:
At a time when our world seems to be spinning faster, and doing more is constantly expected of us, slowing down and learning to allow are essential to our peace of mind and lightness of soul. As well, learning to allow is a fundamental step toward personal empowerment. As we evolve – shifting from a mindset focused on external control to one rooted in inner empowerment – our conscious practice of allowing will help us cultivate deep-seated contentment and joy, which positively affects the vibration of our collective reality. As we enter an awakened state of consciousness, where we have gained distance from the confines of dualistic thinking, we find ourselves at the fulcrum point of neutrality. In some respects, this feels like a good marker; we no longer evaluate experiences as inherently bad (or good), which can reduce or release our suffering. Neutrality brings to us an impersonal realization that what happens to people may not be so… well, personal. At a minimum, it offers a perspective above the haze of harsh judgment. With a shift in awareness and a steadfast grip on the wheel pulling us toward right-or-wrong thinking, we arrive at a paradox. Though our heart may feel lighter and freer, our ego – driven by order, duality, and survival – can begin to panic. When those sharp peaks and valleys of extremes soften into gentle waves, the ego may interpret the smoother ride as boring… or even as an indication of lifelessness. It is here we come upon apathy. When we encounter apathy, we often misperceive what we experience. Is this depression? Not caring? Am I numb to life? If we have identified strong emotions and opinions with caring deeply, and grown appreciative of this aspect of being human, apathy can be an uncomfortable state. Not wishing to idle in unfamiliar territory, our ego rushes back to duality assuming we have gotten off our spiritual course. Our spiritual growth gives us the capacity to appreciate the wholeness of Life, acutely recognizing that the multitude of shades, shapes and experiences are far richer than any duality-based definition. Whether we strive for it, or the occurrences of detached awareness happen spontaneously, the sense of feeling apathetic is simply a part of our awakening process. Neutrality not only allows us to notice the depth and complexity in all things, it offers an underlying contentment to our observation. If we refrain from judging the spiritual apathetic state and allow ourselves to venture deeper into it, we discover its foundation; we realize the Perfection in Everything. According to Merriam-Webster the simple definition of apathy is “the feeling of not having much emotion or interest: an apathetic state.” With neutrality and equanimity, the abundance of “much” diminishes. With signposts touting “the more the merrier” at almost every turn in our lives, we’ve associated anything that implies “less” as some kind of deviation. Our feelings of “lack” and “less than” get triggered and put us into a tailspin. Gee, and all this over feeling a little apathy? An awakening soul rises from the belief that emotions, desires and experiences define the true self. Admittedly, on the trail of neutrality, apathy takes a bit of getting used to. It can show up in various ways, often leaving us feeling disconnected from mass consciousness. For example, we may not feel compelled to participate in activities that no longer resonate, even if others continue in that direction. Conversations that are shallow, heated or controversial can feel pointless. Discovering what makes us “happy” may suddenly seem like an impossible quest. No longer being coerced by old habits, or feeling the pull toward emotional highs and lows, we gain opportunities to let go of what isn’t serving us. Guilt, shame and judgment stop navigating our choices. In the abyss of apathy, we are given the space to simply be. In an apathetic state we may wonder whether who we are or what we do really matters. If the wondering is infused with worry, it is not so much apathy but rather the ego’s desire to land in a comfortable place. And discomfort can be a handy jumpstart to move us toward the direction of our soul’s calling. Untethered from dutiful posts, we are free to explore. Often, we begin our explorations within familiar boundaries, noticing them with more objectivity. Do I identify with this community… or that one? Do I want to volunteer my time in this way… or should I volunteer elsewhere? Maybe I’ll take a painting class… or what about web design? In a more open state, we accept our experiences and experimentations for what they are; we don’t depend on them to define us. With neutrality it is easier to discern which external experiences resonate with our core. Inner journeying is also easier when we enter with equanimity. What used to be major roadblocks to exploring our soul are removed (or reduced to flashing lights signaling to proceed with caution). With our inner judge at bay, our defenses relax. Inviolable, we discover deserted passageways that lead right to our heart. By exploring the depths and nuances of our being without judgment, more of our true self and gifts emerge. In addition to our wondrous heart, our shadowy crevices (and all aspects of who we are) contain gems. In fact, the wisdom of our soul has carefully hidden our greatest treasures where they would be protected most; a place only one with skill and courage would dare to look. The spiritual apathetic state – the remembrance innate Perfection – provides the composure we need to find and excavate our inherent gifts. With neutrality, we can learn to cultivate our gifts without letting them define us or determine our worth. We understand that sharing who we are and what we bring to the world is a choice, not a requirement. And, in electing to do so, we find joy. If we choose not to perceive apathy as a digression from our spiritual path, or let it crumble to disdain, we can embrace it as a powerful tool to guide our conscious journey to self-awareness and joy. Highly awake people tend to be ultra-conscious, which often translates into being overly critical of everything they do, and even who they are. In spite of pure intentions, good deeds and spiritual striving, the weight of self-criticism can bog the spiritual seeker down in Earthy mud and muck! No matter how hard those chakra wheels spin, there is little traction to get unstuck. A belief rises to the surface: If I were only spiritual enough, everything in my life would fall into place. Is this conviction keeping your contentment hostage? Are you constantly trying to “change negative thinking” or “process fears” or perfect your spiritual practices? Are you really sure you are doing everything RIGHT? Perhaps you should learn to meditate in that Earthly mud… or better yet, just play in it! Yes, dear seeker, this moment – as you recognize just how inadequate you are and how many more miles there are to walk on your spiritual journey – is the perfect time to take a long, deep, loving breath and exhale gratitude with a heart-felt “OM.” Put that soft Buddha smile back on your face before you read on. Like any good, spiritual enthusiast, you likely did as instructed… and perhaps you feel better… or not. The question is, Do you believe there is an ever-evading perfect life waiting for you to ascend to it? Rather than process your beliefs about this one, or give you some affirmations to repeat for the next 21 days, here are some essential truths for your heart to behold:
Maybe, wise one, you are already evolved and your only “lesson” is to embrace your Perfection now? Perhaps it is time to stop taking it all so seriously (as you are oh-so-beautifully conscious that you actually know you are always emanating your best anyway). It’s time to have a bit of fun for a change! Need ideas about what to do at recess, spiritual student?
Life is an amazing unfoldment of the All That Is, ever-changing, ever-Perfect, ever-mysterious. As we awaken further to our higher spiritual consciousness, we will discover what we perceive to be obstacles along the way. Are they obstacles? Did we create them? Perhaps. Allowing your Perfection is remembering that you are absolutely spiritual enough, your life is a Divine reflection of your expanding soul, and the present moment is where you get to embrace it… mud, muck and ascension. Trusting your intuition does not have to be about being "right." It can simply be that "quiet voice" of guidance that you use to navigate through your life. We all have this inner knowing as part of our makeup, the question is, Do you use it as part of your self care? A challenge we face is that we have grown up in a society that doesn't teach us to value our own inner guidance. Instead, we are directed to listen to the voices of authority and given a hierarchy of people who "know best" stacked on top of us! Secondly, if you are at all tuned in to your metaphysical senses, you've likely been told the "right" and "wrong" ways to use them. With so many "do's", "don'ts" and "proper" techniques, it can make you feel inadequate. Or, there may be so much psychic interference in your field that you can't discern what's coming from Love Consciousness or your ego. The bottom line is that you are inherently intuitive and - like walking - you simply need to practice. And, just as we each have our own way in which we move through the world, your intuitive hits are just as unique as you. Reducing your exposure to negativity (including media) helps eliminate the external interference that bogs our minds and weighs heavy in our auric fields. The key to discerning the egoic thoughts from the inner guidance is that the ego's voice is shaming and filled with "shoulds" (mimicking the voice of authority) that make you feel less than, rather than hopeful or empowered. As the higher realms continue to prompt us to step more fully into ourselves, learning to trust your intuition is one of the most aligned ways to embrace self care! As you likely feel and know, the Divine Feminine is coming back into harmony within and around us. For centuries the pendulum swung deep into masculine energies and caused many imbalances in basically every aspect of our lives; power, relationships, and caring for our Earth, to name a few. As 2015 unfolds, the pendulum will continue to swing back toward the center against the winds that helped form masculine domination. And, like any egoic authority, it doesn't welcome changes in the power structure. Egos like to feel safe and in control. Thus, this swinging into balance will feel like a "backlash" to those who are anchored in egoic masculine power and will be heartily met with resistance! In addition to welcoming the Divine Feminine, we are re-aligning with the Divine Masculine, where power is anchored in truth, compassion and action. For every release of fear-based structures we will discover the heart of Divine Love shining at its core. Expect, notice and welcome the balancing energies. Ask for release and integration. As we expand spiritually, the human expansion will follow.... allow it. What if we were merely watching a super intense, interactive life-long movie? What if each one of us was the star of this incredible multi-dimensional show, which plays out according to our own vantage point? Metaphysically speaking, this is the essential framework of living as humans on Earth at this time. One of the most challenging aspects of metaphysics is trying to understand its non-linear structure within the limitations of the evaluating mind. As highly evolved souls, in order to give us a human experience, we had to agree to perceive separation (from Oneness consciousness) and engage in linear time and space. These fundamental pieces are the foundation on which our three-dimensional reality has been created. As we evolve spiritually, our perceptions expand to include other concepts and dimensions and we begin to see beyond the basic framework. Thought Projections When spiritual teachers talk about changing our thoughts to change our reality, they are focusing on this primary aspect of our original agreement. In actuality, it is more than just our thoughts that create our reality; our emotions, pre-birth agreements and soul intentions are vital elements. For the sake of simplicity, we will include these other facets when referring to our Thought Projections. In a movie theater the projector displays the movie onto a screen. Light and sound have been digitally captured to create the show which has been modified with such exquisite technology that we enjoy the “realness” of it. The intention of most movies is believability. We, as viewers, want to feel connected to the movie - enjoy the spaceship ride, feel the adrenaline of the chase, experience the romance of the first kiss. If, as a soul, we sincerely wanted a human experience, wouldn’t it be frustrating to have the life-movie be so poorly done that it wasn’t even believable? What a waste of time, right?! Thus, with linear time, ample space and other humans with whom we can interact and experience intense emotions, the realness of our lives become – well – believably real. Thinking of our lives as a series of Thought Projections can provoke feelings of anger, especially in times of pain or crisis when we feel like victims. This, of course, intensifies the reality aspect. Yet, we can allow ourselves to acknowledge those times of pain and suffering - to feel into them completely. We can also remain open to learning the basics of Thought Projections, which can offer us a new, empowering perspective. On any ordinary day, let yourself pretend you are in your own movie. Watch with interest, wonder and humor. Observe your movie with as little attachment as possible. If you do this often you will begin to notice there is more to the movie than just the screen. With intention and willingness, you can become aware of the parts of you that are acting as the projector. When you become conscious of your Thought Projections, you become aware of your impact on them. Nothingness You may be wondering what Nothingness has to do with Thought Projections or Manifesting Reality, but this is a very important aspect for understanding our essence. Like the light that transfers images onto the screen, or the sound that booms from the speakers, there isn’t anything that is physically tangible – there is no matter in these forces, only in the vehicles that deliver them. Though we can validate the realness of sights and sounds, we also understand that they are actually perceptions. In fact, it is only when we don’t have these capacities (or they are diminished) that we recognize how our “lack of perception” impacts our reality. If we imagine being completely blind or deaf – or unable to smell or taste or feel – we define our inability as experiencing “nothing.” In other words, even when matter isn’t involved we perceive our experiences as “something” – they become valid and, in some way, part of our reality. We usually evaluate reality by its Somethingness, but must also understand the value of Nothingness to gain a more complete and empowering perspective. Beyond our perceptions, sound and light are actually frequency wavelengths. The “space” in which there is “nothing” is just as valid as the “something” itself. It is how the entire construct “exists” within the time/space continuum. That said, our thoughts are basically the same kind of construct; a wavelength of something and nothing vibrating at a particular frequency. Those who teach mindfulness – encouraging us to pay attention to all that “happens” – also emphasize the Nothingness (sometimes referred to as the Emptiness). As you can deduce – and vitally important to note – as soon as the mind perceives anything it has immediately created something to perceive! Of prime importance, that something can become a conscious choice in whether it gets played out in our personal movie. From a soul perspective, there is more Nothingness than anything else. The Nothingness is the potential, the pre-thought, the void from which all things emerge. Yet, in order to keep the movie playing, we continuously cast Thought Projections onto the linear timeline. In a meditative state, allow yourself to play with the notion of Nothingness. See if you can “grasp” it. Ask your Higher Self to give you an experience of it. Feel into its potential and imagine what could be created from the expansiveness of no limits! What you may discover is your own essence and power pulsating in that expansiveness... your being as infinite possibility. Manifesting Reality Those seeking instant gratification would likely skip the previous two parts and focus solely on this section, but understanding the fundamentals of Thought Projections and Nothingness are key to Manifesting Reality. Admittedly not complete, the basics are enough to provide a seeker with more tools to understand and explore. Manifesting Reality on Earth (in its crudest form) is dependent on Thought Projections directed onto the “movie screen” of time and space. Although Thought Projections emerge from Nothingess, without time or space they actually – instantaneously – absorb right back into it! Therefore, it is in this instant that we can, once again, recognize and harness the power of pure potentiality. As human beings, with our commitment to participate in the reality of time and space we often feel limited and powerless by life’s circumstances. We may feel we are under the heavy influence of our own automatic, unconscious thoughts, in spite of reciting positive affirmations or mantras. To consciously engage in Manifesting Reality, we must learn to raise our own frequency. When the wavelength of our Thought Projections and the potentiality of the Nothingness vibrate so high that they are practically indiscernible, we will begin to generate miracles! Raising your vibration – physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually – is attainable, but takes consciousness and a commitment to do so. Eat well, rest often, surround yourself with people you love, challenge yourself to learn and grow, and walk upon a spiritual path that makes your heart sing. Ask your Soul to support your ascension; to bring you the people, information and tools you need. Conscious or not, joyful or not, your inherent ability in Manifesting Reality is already playing out for you in the movie of your life. By understanding the power of your Thought Projections, as well as their essential Nothingness, you can take Manifesting Reality to a whole new level. Whether being capable of healing yourself or others, acutely seeing beyond the veils into new dimensions, or simply creating a foundation of joy for your earthly experience, you can evolve from merely Manifesting Reality to Manifesting Your True Soul’s Desires! There are many times throughout the year that seem to imply a new beginning. Given that the last day of one year and first day of the next are often sandwiched somewhere in a holiday break, the difference between the two days is relatively minor - except for maybe the hangover. Yet the desire to "start anew" seems to entice us. Whether it's Spring, the end of the school year or the beginning, "starting anew" is as ingrained in us as time itself. Like all things in nature, we are cyclical beings continuously shifting from a beginning to a middle to an end. In terms of each New Year there seems to be a larger, collective impulse to start again as we have agreed on a global calendar. Personally, we each want our lives to reflect our values and ideals and we recognize how easy it is to get stuck or drift off course. Having time as a constraint, we have decided to use it as a marker... a starting point for something "else." If you are one who enjoys new beginnings, you have likely made some kind of resolve to coincide with the New Year. Though I typically see "New Year's Resolutions" as a way for me to set myself up with over-ambitious expectations, I always set inner intentions for what I desire for the year and shift my focus towards them. Whatever your method, I encourage you to be gentle with yourself. Pick things that are grand, yet doable. Give yourself some wiggle room for growth and find support to help you stay on track. And, most importantly, if you get discouraged along the way, remember you are always exactly where you need to be! Whether you are emotionally sensitive, or psychically or energetically sensitive - or all of the above! - it is important to not only recognize your sensitivity, but to honor it. A simple way to do so is to give yourself space. When you are emotionally sensitive, people's harsh words and emotions can affect you so deeply you want to withdraw, closing your heart. Energetic or psychic sensitivity is harder to recognize (as we don't really validate this in our world); therefore, can be harder to protect. Sure, you can repeatedly stay in contact with those who hurt your feelings or whose anger pokes into you, but why? To preserve your need to feel good - to allow unfiltered JOY into your life - it is best to distance yourself from these kinds of people! In doing so, your need to guard yourself from their harshness, as well as joy, dissolves. When it comes to psychic and energetic overload, just like with people, you need to create distance. Avoid going into overly busy or mis-aligned spaces (i.e. malls, crowds). As well, carve out a space in your own home where you can enjoy a personal retreat with an open heart. Daily space for the sensitive soul is as necessary as air! Take long, cleansing breathes of that simple, sacred space you've created... just for you. What does it mean to be a mystic? Some imagine yogis sitting in meditation for hours on end, or think of mystics as Christ-like people who have extraordinary powers to heal, predict the future, or travel into other realms. Though these are examples of mysticism, a mystic is simply “a person who seeks by contemplation and self-surrender to obtain unity with or absorption into the Deity or the absolute, or who believes in the spiritual apprehension of truths that are beyond the intellect.” When we believe mysticism is reserved for a chosen few, or for those willing to give up all earthly pleasures, we disconnect from our inner mysticism which can be a powerful link to create the lives we desire. By discovering and embracing the mystic we were born to be, we align with authenticity, empowerment and joy. Contemplation and Self-Surrender Meditation can be a form of contemplation, but it is not the only path to unity consciousness. Many mystics use a variety of methods to surrender their egoic limitations and allow for absorption into the absolute. Yoga, spiritual study groups, conscious breathwork, fasting, and dance are all valid actions a mystic can consciously utilize with intention to achieve a spiritual quest. Again, these are not the only methods one can use. If your intention is to experience oneness, then do so in your daily endeavors. While washing dishes, become completely mindful of your task. Feel the plate, notice the soapy sponge as it makes contact to remove the grease, experience the heat of the water. Don’t limit yourself by believing a mystical experience of oneness with the Divine has certain qualities, or wait for it to happen to you spontaneously. Instead, cultivate a practice of seeking oneness with the mundane tasks you perform each day. Allow absorption into the present moment. As well, seek wonder. By opening yourself to the marvels that are ever-present, you release the walls that keep you confined to your smallness. Finding the awe in the things around you may seem to emphasize your smallness, or minimize you to no-thing, but this is an essential shift in awareness. As you expand your perceptions to take in the wonder that exists in all things, you realize the vastness and wonder that is within you… that is you! Star-gaze, sincerely hug a tree, notice your plants dancing softly with the wind, listen deeply to the sounds of birds in your yard, watch a squirrel capture an acorn, spend ten minutes snuggling with your dog. Though you can discover the wonder in anything, connecting with the forces of the natural world is not only pure and easy, it helps align you with your own natural state, which is inherently mystical. Spiritual Apprehension of Truths Intellectually speaking, we can get fixated on what truth really is, and formulate thoughts that lock us in to particular beliefs. Yet truth, like light, can be perceived, experienced, and even manipulated, but can never be grasped in the literal sense. Our mind finds comfort in understanding and containment, helping us feel sure, solid, safe. Mystics are willing to experience the discomfort of uncertainty as they seek truth. The innocence of a child allows each experience or teaching to be taken in as some kind of truth. Through development, understanding and intellect begin to form the information received into perceptions. Discernment allows for rejection of information, whether based on truth or one’s perceptions. Yet, as fallible human beings, our perceptions can become distorted. Therefore, the thoughts we believe may not be completely true. This is okay, unless they limit us, of course. If you are experiencing limitation in your life, your move toward freedom begins with a shift in your perceptions. Most notably, the majority of your untrue perceptions are about yourself! You may even believe you are not a mystic! Whether or not you have consciously taken an oath to obtain unity with the absolute, if you believe in the spiritual apprehension of truths that are beyond the intellect, by definition, you are a mystic!
With access to your mystical power, you become conscious of your perceptions, accept the authority in your choices, and ultimately realize you can define – or not define – what it means to be a mystic.
Are you ready to journey to your mystical self? Collectively, we are working to align into our Grandness, allowing the energy of Source to easily flow through us, as us - unobstructed. Thus, our energy centers are trying to clear old patterns that kept us from feeling, acting and enjoying grace and ease in our lives. Specifically, the heart and throat are doing much work at this time to open and expand in freedom. As the throat chakra represents speaking our truth (among other things), shame, should's, loyalty and fear are primary reasons for causing us to suppress our need to express who we are and what we want. Parents tell us who we are and aren't, schools tell us what we should become, and those we spend most of our time with project all kinds of restrictions on us. In order to be kind, correct and comply, we stop speaking our truth. What can one do to open the throat chakra? A simple task is to sing! Whether you feel comfortable with your voice or not, you can find a variety of places and songs to sing. In the shower or car, while cleaning house, for a lullaby, or even at a karaoke bar, allowing yourself to sing with passion and volume can be incredibly healing for the suppressed chakra. Moreover, finding songs that "speak" your truth adds an extra boost of power. Whether you want to proclaim "One Love" along with Bob Marley, or let your voice climb the "Stairway to Heaven" with Led Zeppelin, singing can be a simple step toward self expression and throat chakra expansion. As we continue on our paths, we are getting clearer and less tolerant of things that do not resonate with our values and our vibration. As such, it makes it nearly impossible to fake our way through the doldrums of have to's. If you are financially dependent on a particular job which pays you to follow through on those have to's, it's not so easy to veer off the beaten path. For those who are financially secure, choices may seem easier, right? Not necessarily. More attachments can make it difficult to let go. In addition to financial constraints, what about meeting the needs those who depend on us - children, spouses, friends? In this place between living the integrated life you envision and the growing intolerance of your living conditions, it can be hard to keep the faith and keep going. But you can do it! And the energies are expanding to support you! As we continue to evolve we are, collectively, heading toward more joyful, authentic and empowered lives. Little by little you can learn to trust in your ability to create what you desire as you narrow down your list of have to's to really, really have to's. In fact, you'll discover the short list will actually lead you to your new path! In the interim, why not whistle why you work? (Or Sing!) No need to fake anything. Cultivating a sincere "attitude of gratitude" is faith in action, plus it supports you to keep on keepin' on. |
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