 Have you been feeling physically, emotionally or psychically bad this last week or so? What are you feeling in your body or energy fields right now? Take a minute to scan yourself and notice what’s going on before you read my story.
Last week I began my day feeling unusually tired. Interestingly enough, two of my friends had also felt the same way just before we went on our hike. In nature, amongst the rocks and stream, birds and breeze, and the warmth of the sun, the exhaustion dispersed. Seems reasonable, right? What we discovered, to our surprise, is that as soon as we returned to the city, with the people, cars and hustle and bustle (albeit a rural version of hustle and bustle), we noticed that we were once again wiped out! There was a noticeable difference in the two spaces and the congested area seemed to affect us directly in a negative way. Additionally, last week, feelings of “fuck it” began to surface. “What’s the point?,” swelled within me more times than one. By the weekend, I had an intense melt down. It was triggered by a desire to have the simplicity of my family together, which was not unfolding as I had wished. I felt a deep rage… mine… others’… the collective’s. I laid down for a half hour or so and the rage softened, but never completely dissolved. Sunday was my twin daughters’ birthday and we went to breakfast. It was lovely, but I chose to eat the gluten free pancakes that came with my meal… with butter… and syrup… of course. Well, as I have not been doing (many) grains recently, I enjoyed the delicious high but crashed hard by noon! I took a wiped-completely-out-and-drooling kind of two-hour nap. Yesterday, I paid for the two-and-a-half-not-so-big-GF-pancakes-with-butter-and-syrup with a horrible, toxic headache… all day. I was sure by the time I got home and into my pajamas at 4 pm I would feel better, but I didn’t. The headache weighed me into another exhaustion and left me non-functional and even more so “fuck it.” By night, I had received a text from one of my hiking buddies that she had a migraine. This friend, like me, is extremely tapped in to the collective and our planet. Thus, just before crawling into bed, I sent out a Facebook status asking if others had been feeling the intense heaviness, and threw in a request for healing energy. Of the 21 comments I received yesterday and today (many of which were offering xoxo’s, <3’s and healing), more than half commented that they, too, had felt similar symptoms:
Thus, I’ve decided to “look” at this, as I am on day two of the headache and have been GF-pancake-with-butter-and-syrup-free for two days now and have been sensing that there is something more to what I and others are experiencing. It feels unusual and “bigger” than what meets the eye. As I was talking to another friend (the non-migraine hiker who’s been having a hard time sleeping), I started getting pictures and downloads and strands of possibilities. What’s interesting to me is that I told her that I felt like this had something to do with the missing airplane – Flight 370 – story. Strange, I know. It surprised me, and as I often get analogies and symbols, I kept this as a possible interpretation for something. There are a couple of things I want to say before I continue. First, I don’t have a television or pay attention to the media, mainstream or otherwise, and haven’t learned much about the Flight 370 incident. As well, I am not a “conspiracy” type person – at all! – though I do believe we as a whole have been living so far out of alignment that we have allowed suppressive systems to grow and flourish for eons. And, finally, of course I could be wrong about what I see energetically! I don’t claim to be right about anything, really, but I have learned in my practice as an intuitive to just allow whatever it is to come through me. In fact, it’s all I really need to do and it’s up to others to evaluate and resonate (or not) with the information I bring. What I see is that we are at the verge of making a collective “quantum leap” if we wish. As many of us know, things have been shifting for many years and people are really waking up and beginning to accept their power. Yet, what I also see, feel and know is that there is a lot of resistance. In fact, it sometimes seems as if the resistance is greater than the pull to evolve. The resistance is both internal and external. And, if you think about it, the internal resistance that we are generating as a collective is equally matched with external resistance; aka entities and situations that keep us out of alignment and out of our power. So, what does this have to do with Flight 370? When I first heard of the flight I thought, “Hm… that’s weird, but I’m sure it’ll resolve soon.” But it didn’t. And the tidbits I caught just seemed fishy. No, I haven’t looked deeply into “what happened” to the flight, as I don’t feel it is in my place (nor my interest, honestly), but I do have the sense of foul play… as many do. What I see is that this flight was “hijacked” from the “inside.” This does not seem like a terrorist act, or even something related. It feels like an act of force and misused power on a really big scale. Big, not because it’s a large plane with lots of people, but because it feels like governments are involved. It feels like a “trade” or a “deal” of some kind. Obviously, (to me) it was important to make this happen and cover it up. The stakes feel big – some kind of bargain that has far reaches. So what do the headaches and the discomforts have to do with all of this? What I see is that there are huge, powerful manipulations of forces going on and they are taking place because of the consciousness shifts, because of our collective resistances to them, and because of the huge leap we are close to taking. I say ‘close’ because it is as if our collective flight has been hijacked in some way! To me, I am seeing the same “government” powers involved. I am not sure “which” government (which actually doesn’t matter) or how the two are specifically – on a material level – related or how exactly the discomforts are “produced” or if they are produced from an outside force at all. What I have been seeing for years is that one major “outside force” is really an internal one; our soul’s agreement to expand with the collective and the pressure cooker we feel we are in as that which no longer serves us is pressed right out of us! Going back to Flight 370 and our collective hijacking, I could only imagine the fear, pain and suffering of the passengers, can’t you? Yes… and that’s why we are feeling this intensity. Not only are we becoming highly attuned to one another, and the plights of our sister-beings, but we are attuned to the leap we are ready to make, and we felt this hijacking. But what do we do? Again, what would you do if you were on a flight that was being hijacked by our “leaders?” Shock, rage, fear, confusion, and likely the will to survive would unfold within and around you! Would you sleep in your horribly uncomfortable squashed seat? Ask for another drink? Jump from the plane? Would you band together and take action in spite of your fear and uncertainty of your future? By no means do I wish to judge or make light of an actual airline hijacking situation, or instill fear in you in any way. Yet, what I see – and feel, unfortunately – is the affects of a passive, overpowered collective that has so much inner resistance to our quantum leap that it is subject to hijacking (or worse). What we’ve been experiencing recently, feels to me that we are – right now – being hijacked from our intended course! So how do we release our resistance and reset our course? First, and foremost, we must be gentle with ourselves. Eat well. Sleep. Keep things simple. Go on hikes. And do whatever you can to nourish your body and soul. Just as I have with this headache situation, feel into your own suffering and look at it with as much neutrality as possible. Is it yours? Is there an underlying message? How can you shift it with love and care? Keep things simple. Oh, did I already say that? Yes, I did! Our busyness keeps us distracted and out of our power. It distracts us from our feelings, our fears, from doing things we really love, and from noticing things we should be noticing. Stay in alignment. Keep the faith. Stay on your path to your soul’s calling. Be the light for the world. Be your authentic self. Cultivate joy! Encircle yourself with loving protection. Visualize yourself surrounded by white light, a golden shield or use any other intention to preserve your body and energy field from things that don’t serve you. This isn’t about fear, it’s about intention and boundaries. Notice and set them. Own your power. No, you don’t need to fix every aspect of yourself. In fact, trying to “better” yourself is often dis-empowering because you align with a belief that there is something wrong with you. This is not true. Owning your power simply means you say yes to who you are and act accordingly. Change the world. Yep. It’s what you came to do. It’s what many of us are here to do and we can’t keep procrastinating. By being complacent, we allow things to happen that don’t need to happen. Our power, especially when we band together, is extraordinary! We envision a world that is peaceful and fair and safe and healthy and abundant. It is our duty to manifest this vision one mindful step at a time. Now, as you finish reading this, scan your body for two things. First, does this information resonate with you in any way? Second, how is your body or energy field feeling now? Did something shift or soften when you read this? Personally, I still have a slightly dull headache, but a sense of relief and renewal has enlivened me and my “fuck it’s” are gone!
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Recently, I had a bout of vertigo. It hit me while I was driving home in the dark on curvy mountain roads. Oh, and I didn't have anyone else to take the wheel as I carted my kids home! I was surprised to find two things: a dear friend was also hit with vertigo around the same time, and there was a meteor that hit Russia about an hour and a half beforehand.  Generally speaking, I don't "feel" planetary shifts. I don't have physical sensations of earthquakes or other significant planetary shifts. In all honesty, I have more of a "knowing" of energetic patterns. I feel them psychically and, once tuned in, I can often feel it in my body.
So what was the significance in my (and my friend's) vertigo and this meteor? As we move through 2013 and beyond, we - the collective as well as the Universe - are creating such a dynamic change in our way of being, that is it going to affect the physicality of who we are. In other words, we are merging our light/soul bodies with our physical bodies in a way that has never been done before. The merging of our whole selves is happening in startling and fundamental ways. This, as such, will result in more capabilities, joy and power / life force in our bodies. Which, indeed, is a significant expansion and can have both dizzying and impactful affects!  At these times, we are moving through a spiritual awakening that can take our breath away. Some may believe we are feeling overwhelmed because we have gotten so busy and are over-tasked. Yes, many of us continue to expand in the “doing” category. Yet, even for those who have taken the road to simple living, our energetic forces seem to be propelling us forward.
Forward is a direction, isn’t it? A direction, indeed, but also an illusion. (The spiritual reality is there is no space or time.) When we feel the inner stirrings of our soul expanding, growing and somehow wanting – and becoming – “more,” we can wonder about our sanity, sense of self and what we’re supposed to do with it all. What are we to do with it all? We don’t have to do anything. We can simply relax into it. We are individually and collectively expanding into “more.” We are becoming clearer, more open conduits for an awakened consciousness. This allows our Divinity to shine through us more brightly. What does this mean? An awakened consciousness simply has a greater awareness of Oneness; of knowing itself as One with Source – or the All That Is. It is who we are anyway, but knowing, being and integrating this Truth is “where” we are going. So, why is this happening? We are evolving. Like all energy sources, we are in a pattern / agreement for expansion right now. It is a cosmic path of unfolding and we are simply in this phase of evolution. Can it be avoided? Yes and no. People can choose whatever they wish. In fact, as our consciousness evolves, the decisions we make will manifest in “harder” terms. In other words, our reality will reflect our decisions more quickly and more concretely – even those unconscious ones. You are likely noticing this in your life right now. Yet, in terms of the larger picture, no, it is not completely avoidable. When it rains, you can grab an umbrella or go inside, but you cannot stop the rain. Earthquakes shake the earth and if we are standing on that portion that is being shifted, we will be affected in one way or another. Is there anything to fear? Funny question! People always find things to fear, don’t they? It is part of human nature, actually, to tap into fear. It serves us well, when necessary, but many times it is simply an emotion spun from unhealthy thought patterns and old beliefs. Thus, when fears arise, simply breathe into them, acknowledge and be with them. Do not be tempted to shame yourself, but rather be gentle – as you would with a frightened child. The bottom line is that, as we awaken, we are stepping into our Grandness, our Perfection. With that comes change, including releasing of old energies that no longer serve us. This, in itself, can cause fear. Yet, what is truly frightening about becoming who you already are? Are there things that can ease the process? Are there ways to not feel crazy, or like life is spinning out of control? Absolutely. Did someone mention to breathe? Oh, yes, that is always the first place to start. When we are in fear, unconsciousness, or are overly busy, our breathing patterns shift – we often have shallow breathing, hold our breath, or may even hyperventilate. Slowing down our lifestyles is another biggie. Where can you eliminate some of the busyness in your life? Can you create a more “sane” schedule where work, family, chores, fun and self care are more in balance? Can you set aside more “nothingness” time? When you are running forward on a people-mover at an airport, rather than just riding it, isn’t it incredibly faster? If standing isn’t an option, perhaps you can slow down to just a stroll. Listening to your inner guidance will help you through your awakening more than anything else. Unfortunately, many people have lost touch with their own intuition. This can resurface if we nurture it and actually pay attention to that inner voice. It’s a matter of trust and practice. Is there anything else? There’s always something else. You are an infinite being of Love and Wisdom! This inevitably means there is always more… to become, to know, to learn. As you need it, trust that what you need will come to you. For now just know that this time of your spiritual awakening is simply YOU becoming MORE of YOU!  What is darkness? What is light?
Oftentimes we use these words to describe spirituality. Yet, in essence, neither one exists. The spiritual reality is there is no duality, no separation. Only One.... the All. Yet, on this earthly plane, we experience light and dark in our lives. We can be in a dark room, and turn on a light, or vice versa. Instinctively, our human selves tend to be more comfortable with the light than the dark. Why is that? In darkness it is harder to "see", so we don't feel as safe. There is a vast unknown in darkness. Spiritually, when we refer to these seemingly polar opposites, we tend to equate light with love and dark with hate or fear. Ah... so even spiritually, our souls gravitate to the light. But what about the darkness? Why is it that some humans and souls are attracted to the dark, or hate or fear? Is it their conditioning, upbringing, own fears, or is it their essence? It is simply an expression, an experience of the One; the All That Is includes darkness. Do we need to "conquer" or illuminate this darkness? Actually, we can try, if we so choose, and we can choose to feel good or "right" about it. Many stories, movies and fairy tales are built upon this very theme: light conquering dark. Yet, the spiritual reality is that darkness will never be "overcome" because, as stated to begin with, it doesn't exist. And, in the realms with light and dark - realms with duality - it will always exist. For every yin, there is a yang; the "two" compliment each other, or in the higher realms "cancel each other out" - however you want to perceive it. Shall you fear the darkness? Only if you choose. It can be frightening, indeed. Darkness is empty and unknown, yet it is mysterious and full of infinite possibilities. It is the void within each of us. Shall you awaken to the light? Only if you choose. If you perceive the light as awareness, then you can simply enjoy "seeing better" when you have some light. Yet, when you can see more clearly, you may not necessarily like what you see. Rather than try to understand or grasp any of these concepts, perhaps you simply allow. Allow yourself to be the light and the dark. You are anyway... you are the All, remember?  Once a month or so, I used to offer inspirational talks which I called "Illuminations" at both Planet Earth Rising in Folsom and the former East West Books in Sacramento. Each time, I offered some thoughts about the experiences we are having as we spiritually evolve as well as things we can do to help ease our discomforts. For example, at this time of awakening, we are growing and expanding so much (though it may not seem like it) that we are completely wiped out; a lot like a newborn baby who is growing and expanding so much that all it can do is eat and sleep all day! In fact, it takes so much energy to do this vast amount of physical growing, that we simply allow babies to do those two basic things – eat and sleep – and not much else. If you are experiencing this sense of exhaustion, give yourself permission to ease up on yourself and allow yourself to “do nothing” if at all possible. During one of my talks at Planet Earth Rising, I suggested the idea of “doing nothing.” Soon after, one of the attendees emailed me seeking more clarity about this suggestion. I responded to Aaron, a Folsom resident, in a return email, which he has been gracious enough to allow me to share with others. For some of you, perhaps "doing nothing" is a new concept that is asking to be considered in your own life at this time. If you can consider how much you are expanding on the “inside” maybe you can allow yourself to “do nothing” on the “outside.” For others, this may be the perfect time to review this concept. For clarity, I've identified Aaron's email with an A (and italics). Note that it was written in one blanket email. My “answers” are identified with a V and, when I responded to him, were inserted into his email - as it is formatted below. Thanks again, Aaron, for letting me share our email conversation with others!
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