For All the Ways Love Remembers Us

Work in progress... an embroidery gift for Kendall.

For all the ways love remembers us...
Us. 
Is it two, or six?
Me and you, or the whole of us, including our children?
It must be six,
as they represent four of the ways love remembers us.
In their hearts, in their actions,
the curves of their faces.
You, me... our creations.

What is way number one?
Our first date? The first "I love you"?
Are the ways even countable
like drops in a sea?
Evaporation, rain, even the storms that build
adding pressure and tension.
Should I count the storms as love?
Or perhaps it was our endurance of them?

Our children aren't merely a product of love,
they are beings all their own,
carrying DNA, bad habits, humor
and interesting characteristics.
I so often tell them, "just like Dad," with
longing, love and pride.

We all want to conjure you back to our present.
This, I know, is a way love remembers us.
Even as it pierces with unavoidable pain.

What, exactly, does love remembering us 
feel like?
Joy? Sorrow? Life living itself through our
mortal actions?

And when I am gone, too, will the 
memories fade?
Even our children can't conjure up -
in words, stories, or emotion - 
the exactness of our love.
And now that you aren't here, I'm not sure
I am doing any justice in trying.

Photos, things, stories... all inadequate
reflections of you, but I grasp.
Even in tapestry.

I started a new embroidery project.
A photo of you and Kendall fishing.
An iconic photo.
Your smile, her eagerness, the fishing
line with a mark of something at the 
surface of the river.

Stitch by stitch, I am doing my best to do
it justice.
The strands of gray at your temple,
your form and strength and pride.
I know it is just a rough depiction 
of that tender, yet vibrant, moment.
I know my stitches are hopeful,
verging on the bank of perfectionism.

But that's me. My memories,
my heart, my artistry wanting to convey
just one solid way of how 
love remembers us.

Inspired by a line in a poem by Alison Luterman: "how love remembers us."

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